Last night I was trying to fall asleep, but kept thinking about the blog instead. I literally had visions of bar charts dancing in my head. Of course that got me onto the new train of thought of trying to rewrite the entire Night Before Christmas poem… It was a long night. But here are the results!
‘Twas my first week of blogging, when all thro’ the house,
Not a creature was stirring, except for my mouse;
I was clicking and typing as fast as I dare,
In hopes that some readers (new followers?) would care.
Saw midnight then one ‘fore I climbed into bed,
While view counts and bar charts danc’d round in my head,
My computer is hot as it rests on my lap,
Just one more draft – must… say… no.. – it’s a trap!
Thrilled by new comments, and questions, and chatter,
I wish and I hope that my words really matter.
Big fancy ideas through my mind did flash,
Pay for a domain name? I don’t have the cash!
I’m keeping it secret from people I know,
Until I have something that’s worth it to show.
But as I keep writing and posting on here,
Dear Readers, you ALL truly fill me with cheer.
Some comment slowly and some comment quick,
My eyes must deceive me, it must be a trick.
And faster than I could imagine they came,
New readers and followers who call me by name.
And here’s where my poem starts to need fixin’,
‘Cuz what in the world rhymes with Vixen or Blitzen?
Support me, dear Readers, don’t let my blog fall;
Now link away! click away! talk to me all!
I’m prepping and planning, preparing to fly,
When I need an adventure, I’ll take to the sky;
And on to new places, and countries brand new,
Some see the world – so I want to too!
Will my story last? I would like some proof,
And you all can help me by sharing this spoof!
As I read others’ blogs, of which many abound,
I keep my head in the clouds but my feet on the ground.
Oh no, there it goes, my fast asleep foot,
Should I move, get a drink? Nah, I’ll just stay put.
What if someone comments? I have to write back,
I swear seeing new “likes” is akin to crack!
Oh no! network failure! things are soon to get hairy;
Please help me quickly, oh Internet Fairy!
My screen is so bright, and makes my face glow,
But alas, no tan – I’m still pale as the snow;
The agony of waiting makes me gnash my teeth,
With bags under my eyes, like half of a wreath.
When did I last shower? I might be a tad smelly;
When did I last eat? I hear growls from my belly.
I’ll be old and grey when my blog runs itself,
And I laugh’d when I thought it, in spite of myself;
A couple new followers have gone to my head,
But now it is late and my brain’s going dead.
I get up to pee, but go right back to work,
I nod off in my chair, snap my head with a jerk.
It’s late and I’m tired, so my laptop I close,
And lumbering slowly, with aches, I arose.
I looked at my page views and let out a whistle,
They’ve slowed for the night, that’s the bell for dismissal.
My eyes are all blurry, but oh – what sight –
Happy first week of blogging, and to all a good night!